Martoons

Cast of characters

Dame

*

Truly, as the mental image of the buffed, ultra-talented fellow Canadian became clearer in Dame’s mind, he started to get bummed and felt his teeth involuntarily clenching together.

Thomas seemed to have all the luck.

All the usual gossip, backstabbing and drama that could easily demoralize a wet-behind-the-ears foreigner, was like water off Thomas’s back.

You could stick a thousand knives in that guy’s back and every single blade would bend!

Dame knew that firsthand – he’d stuck the biggest ones in!

Dame’s selfish, jealous and vengeful side secretly hoped that Thomas hadn’t got even a single touchy-feely with the Java Gypsy.

Dame imagined getting into Thomas’ head as his conscience and scolding him: “No touchy Coffee Lady! No touchy Coffee Lady!”

He laughed as he imagined the Caffeine Queen swatting Thomas’s eager hand away from her hair or other curvaceous features.

Dame called out, “That-a-girl!” and applauded to the imaginary scene.

He was out of breath now as he reached the top of her café stairs. On the landing, he caught his breath after a mild coughing fit.

A tingle rippled through him as he reached for the door, even though he and Coffee Lady were history. Emotional dependencies die hard.

Slipping somewhat guiltily into the café, Dame clearly felt different now: His resolution to leave Korea – soon – ironically made him feel more comfortable and at ease with being here.

He didn’t have to prove himself anymore. It was pointless – he was done; game over. This was the post-game show.

As the glass door swung closed behind him, Dame eagerly scanned the room’s expanse yet Coffee Lady was nowhere to be seen.

The main café room was virtually vacant.

* Where is Coffee Lady? *

The only person stirring was a young, pimply-faced staffer who looked fresh out of high school.

She was sitting on a stool behind the counter checking her pager and didn’t even notice Dame as he entered.

He recalled how when he’d had a thing going for Coffee Lady previously, no matter how many times or when he visited this café, she was always in.

Now, for the first time since they were over, she was absent.

Yet all was not lost.

Dame’s backup plan came together in his head as he nipped off to the men’s room: First, get a hot, extra strength black coffee.

Hopefully business here had been slow for a while and whatever coffee pot simmering on the burner had evaporated enough moisture to begin converting its contents to tarry molasses.

Then, after jump-starting his cerebellum, he’d head out to the University village to flirt with flighty females and meet his boys – the university seniors.

It would be business as usual:

They’d play cards all night. He’d whoop their butts as usual, but then spend all his winnings (their money) on them – soju, meals, maybe even a VIP room.

Just like he’d told them the other night, this might be the last night they’d spend together.

When I finally do leave this God-forsaken peninsula, I will miss the hell out of those guys.

But sentiment was not Damion Lee’s strong point. In fact, he loathed the emotion.

He cherished his friendship with the seniors precisely because it wouldn’t last: They’d soon all graduate and be gone. Jobs. Wives. Kids. Sucked up into the Korean machine.

And he’d be gone too. Which reminded him: He had to face the unpleasant task of contacting his sister Donna for his airfare back.

He never liked to ask nobody for nothin’; but this was different: He always called in his favours and Donna owed him a whopper.

She wouldn’t be working here if it hadn’t been for good ol’ brother Dame’s soju tent advocacy – i.e. video tape blackmail – with Mr Go.

*

Tomorrow: Mr Go stops in at Coffee Shop Max.