Martoons

Cast of characters

Fred

Drinky Poo – a drunk man

Rose

*

Only a few buildings until his turnoff, Fred spotted the Hollywood Inn.

Small world. Wasn’t this the place Max had just been talking about on the phone?

It was a four story building with mere window shapes on its front edifice and they were covered-over with permanently closed metal shutters, perhaps to reflect the traffic noise from the rotary.

You can tell a lot about a country from its windows, Fred mused.

He saw the symbolism – Korea was a country that was hard to see into.

Having that vague affinity with a place that comes from discovering it after someone has mentioned it previously, Fred walked past the Hollywood Inn’s front entrance just as a late-20s-ish Korean man emerged from it, apparently embroiled in a shoving match with a woman of about the same age who came out right after.

His girlfriend?

Fred couldn’t see the man’s face as the lighting directly in front of the inn was dim.

Outside on the sidewalk now, the woman stepped up and shoved the man with quite a bit of force.

He stumbled backward but after stabilizing himself, cocked his forearms and stepped forward, thrusting his palms into her shoulders.

This time her high-heels clicked backward rapidly. Miraculously she didn’t fall down.

Without even thinking, Fred’s protective instincts kicked in and he immediately intervened by stepping between the two.

“What the …” the man said in an off-speed, slurred voice.

“Two questions – A – Who the hell are you? And B – what the hell are you doing!”

The man appeared impaired. His movements seemed rubbery and his voice slurred.

Nevertheless Fred was surprised by drinky poo’s high level of English, even if it was garbled.

Suddenly Drinky Poo lunged at Fred. “I know you – you’re the Canadian…”

* Who is this man and how does he know Fred? *

He sprung forth in slow motion and Fred easily sidestepped him, then – for fun – tripped him as he passed.

Drinky Poo did a face plant. Smack, onto the sidewalk.

“Ayeesh! Son of a bitch!”

The woman who’d been grappling with Drinky Poo shrieked, then collected herself and withdrew to the Inn’s entrance.

Drinky Poo picked himself up and – as if Fred wasn’t even there – also stepped toward the entrance but Fred blocked his way again.

Drinky Poo wasn’t able or willing to muster much of a struggle and stood there perplexed.

“Don’t you know, sir,” Fred said, “that you’re not supposed to fight women? I mean, what would Confucius say?”

Drinky Poo didn’t respond and then the woman suddenly emerged from the exit. “Yah!”

To Fred’s astonishment, she was yelling at him – Fred!

Even more shocking was that she then came at him swinging her purse. Or maybe not.

* What is happening? *

When he stepped aside, the woman went right past him and twirled the purse at Drinky Poo, who tried to block the onslaught by raising his forearms into an X shape.

Did she just come at me? Fred wondered. Or am I imagining this bizarreness?

A taxi had pulled up and the periphery of its headlight beam slightly illuminated the scene, but Fred still couldn’t see Drinky Poo’s face.

He did recognize the woman however, or thought he did.

Was it Cleaning Lady’s shy daughter Rose!? He was aghast.

Rose had missed Drinky Poo with her purse; even with his slow reflexes he was able to come around and grab her from behind.

“Got you now,” he said with a conniving chuckle.

She feebly tried to squirm out of his bear hug.

Fred was confused about what was going on so he took a step back to observe.

Drinky Poo, still in the shadows, was covering his face from the taxi’s headlight.

Then he tore Rose’s bag out of her hand and threw it on the sidewalk.

He shoved her back where she stumbled into some empty boxes. Then, oddly, he broke out laughing.

“Why?” Rose said. “Ayeesh!”

This was all too weird, Fred thought: A couple engaged in fisticuffs – and laughing about it?

Keeping his distance, Fred instructed Rose to pick up her bag and go home.

Or go back in the Inn. Or move on.

Drinky Poo walked with purpose over to Rose and extended her a hand. She reluctantly yet dutifully took it and was pulled out.

She brushed herself off and stiffly put her arm in Drinky Poo’s.

Fred was stupefied. “Rose,” he shrugged. “Whoever this guy is, he can’t treat you like that! You don’t have to put up with this.”

Drinky Poo used his forearm to wipe the sweat off his forehead.

“Why don’t you mind your own business Mr Rent-a-cop? This has nothing to do with you.”

* Will Fred get some clarity on this scuffle? *

*

Tomorrow: Drinky Poo is angry and so is Fred.