Martoons

Cast of characters

Fred

Thomas

Coffee Lady

Damion

*

“I’ll be expecting your call,” Thomas said to Fred. “We foreigners have to stick together.”

“I’ll try to make it down to Ulsan sooner rather than later.”

* Will Fred get the chance to go and visit Thomas in Ulsan? *

Thomas chuckled but waved him off mildly.

“I’ve got to warn you: It might be disappointing. Ulsan’s got to be the most unsightly, dreary-looking place ever.

“I think the city’s architects all had serious soju hangovers when they designed it!” He reached for the exit door.

“Good people, though. Great people. You know, oddly enough, what makes it great is that a lot of folks in Ulsan aren’t from there.

It’s a big industrial centre so a lot of folks came from other Korean towns. They’re outsiders just like me, in a slightly different way.

So yeah, come on down but look: Don’t worry too much about me. Worry about yourself first.

* Do you think Fred might get caught up in some drama? *

This place comes at you from all sides. And everything happens behind the scenes here. So much goes unsaid.”

They shook hands a final time; Thomas left and Fred ducked back in the café.

He took his coffee from the counter and retreated to one of the booths. Most were vacant at this time of day.

Cafés like this did the bulk of business after dark.

Just as Fred sank into his booth to relax, a vaguely familiar Korean man emerged from the vestibule that came from the washroom.

Fred found himself suddenly on the alert. Somehow, someway he felt he’d met the man before.

And something was telling him it hadn’t been good.  

*

Dame+Rose          

The man immediately came across as obnoxious and offensive. He took his seat in a booth near the counter, facing toward it.

He commenced to watching every move Coffee Lady made and kept trying to get her attention but she was ignoring him.

“Coffee Lady,” he cooed. “Oh, Coffee Lady…”

He’s not getting it, Fred thought, watching the guy with bemused amazement. Where do they manufacture idiots like this?

Yet as Fred heard him speaking, it was clear he was a foreigner. The inimitable Damion.

 “Got any yellow tape,” Dame said to Coffee Lady, “you know that stuff the cops use for marking off crime scenes?”

“You better rope off that washroom TFN. Smell – very bad.”

He fanned his hand in front of his face. “I must have chowed-down on some rotten kimchi…” He laughed.

“Wait, what am I talking about? That stuff’s all rotten! Kimchi = rotten cabbage.”

He took a sip of his coffee and his face contorted. “Coffee’s good though. You could black-top driveways back home with this stuff.”

Coffee Lady dutifully approached his table to top-up his java. He then tugged at her and she stiffly sat down beside him in the booth.

He stared into her eyes with a big gushy smile but she only looked down humbly. They were over but he wanted to let her down easy.

“This is the life,” he said, and then quickly disengaged his arm and fumbled around in a backpack beside him, producing his video camera. “Smile!”

Coffee Lady wasn’t interested and just sat there pouting.

“Okay, okay,” Dame said rolling the camera, “scowl then. Just be your beautiful self.”

“Turn that thing off!” she snarled.

Dame did so reluctantly. “Hey baby, question: When I was in the can, the voices of foreigners reached my tender ears. Was I imagining things?

“After last night’s little Rotary episode with Rosie-O, I’ve had just about enough of dumb waygooks – cultural illiterates.” He scoffed.

* So it was Dame whom Fred saw fighting with Rose… *

Coffee Lady didn’t say anything. Dame tried to pull her closer again but she resisted.

“Ayeesh!” she protested. “No touchy!”

Fred, back in the shadows of the café, was mildly amused by Dame and his camera; it was a nice distraction from how horrible Fred’s coffee tasted.

He hadn’t really wanted it but hated to waste anything so he nursed it ever so slowly.

As Dame babbled away, Fred looked up occasionally but was careful to remain inconspicuous.

Admittedly, his image of Dame was changing and he was curious about the man.

Dame always seemed to have his finger on the pulse of things – for better or worse.

And his name – or Dame himself! – seemed to keep popping up wherever Fred went.

This guy was everywhere.

*

Tomorrow: Coffee Lady finally speaks her mind.