Martoons

Cast of characters

Thomas

Fred

Max

Mr E

Coffee Lady

*

There was nervous fidgeting and whispering. After several excruciating seconds, Coffee Lady plunked her metal chopsticks on her plate – clank!

“Marry a foreigner? No way!! I am Korean. I want to be pure Korean!”

The table went absolutely silent. Thomas went white as a ghost. It was as if he was an inflatable and someone had just pulled his plug. P-s-s-s-s-h-h-h …

* What will come of Thomas and Coffee Lady’s relationship after this? *

One hell of a reality check for Thomas, Fred thought. Coffee’s sobering statement even gave Fred the chills.

He wanted to tell Thomas, “You can’t screw with the culture here,” but kept quiet.

He suddenly felt distant from his compatriot, and looked inward and thought again about his own future in Korea: Completely uncertain.

And, yeah, he was now certain he’d quaffed the soju shots too fast and felt nauseated.

A nearby empty shot glass sat there begging to be filled but Fred nudged it away. He shuffled in his seat and straightened up.

“Well folks,” he announced to the table now engulfed in silence, “it’s been a slice but maybe I should get going.”

Max quietly waved him off and then reached for a bottle. “There’s still more soju.”

He topped-up Fred’s glass and scanned the table for other empty ones.

E and Coffee Lady slowly resumed their eating and chatting. The plateful of deep fried pork pieces was shrinking.

Thomas turned to Fred: “Get going – and leave me – your old buddy – stranded? After that icy reaction from Coffee Lady, shouldn’t I be the one who’s leaving?”

He shrugged and chuckled. “Holy crap, talk about a kick in the nuts.”

Fred: “I just remembered – I’m supposed to go and talk to Miss No tomorrow to discuss my future so I gotta be on the ball.

If I’m a bit slow or don’t have my usual edge, she’ll walk all over me. And then I’ll have to leave Korea.”

Thomas scoffed. “Worry about that tomorrow. Right now, forget about time.

“When you’re drinking with Koreans, the world is going to end tomorrow and this is the last meeting.”

“So buddy, you ain’t leaving until the last drop of soju is gone. And remember – everybody leaves together. Got it?”

* Will Fred stay? *

Fred thought about it. “Okay, for your sake, okay.”

He relaxed and took comfort in the fact that he was half way across the globe from Canada, sitting with a Canadian buddy.

Small world.

He patted Thomas on the back. “You sure you’re okay, buddy? Coffee Lady just shot you down in flames.”

Thomas shrugged him off. “I keep telling you, don’t worry about me …”

Fred finished the thought as if reciting a catechism. “Worry only about yourself. This place comes at you from all sides.”

“I didn’t expect Coffee Lady to accept first time. If I keep asking her she’ll finally accept. It’s pure physics.”

* Will that be the case? *

After the latest quaffing of shots, it appeared that now the soju was gone.

“Waitress, bring another tray of soju bottles…” Max cried out recklessly.

E restrained him and they consulted briefly. Max nodded, waved off the waitress and made a revised announcement: “Let’s move on to next place.”

He explained to the waygooks, “We usually hit three places. Korean custom. Let’s go Number Two.”

* What is destination number two? *

*

Tomorrow: The group makes their way towards their second place of the night.