Martoons

Cast of characters

Miss No

Miss Ping – Mr Kang’s secretary

Mr Kang

*

”Where is that money?” cried Miss No. ”You are responsible!”

She had her eyes lined-up on Kang like guns.

He scoffed, shrugged and looked uncomfortable. No was shaping up to be a more formidable opponent than he’d ever imagined.

“I never actually touch any of the money, only the secretary does.”

“I don’t care who’s touching the money. I want to know where it’s going.”

She continued her piercing stare but Kang waved her off.

* Where is the money going? *

“Don’t implicate me. There is no motive. I am a rich man. I should tell you about my father.”

He reached and turned the desk-top portrait of his father sporting his long white beard, toward No.

“He got very rich in real estate…” but before Kang could explain the story his stomach acids went haywire from last night’s rotten food and he recoiled. “Ow!”

He crouched over in his chair and then fled for the can, never getting to tell Miss No the story about his father being too old to enjoy his money and then dying.

Sitting with a moment to herself, No found the picture striking.

The old man reminded her of Santa Claus but he looked wealthy. It was the look in his eyes.

Kang returned quickly from the men’s.

“Ok,” No said, “so obviously you’re not feeling well today so let’s keep this short and sweet. I came here today to track down missing money. That’s it.

“This place is making cash and most of it’s supposed to be sent back to me in Chinju for business development. I’m getting peanuts!”

Kang figured he’d better throw the dog a bone to try to get rid of Miss No, as he could feel another stomach gas gurgle erupting.

“Okay, money does get sent out. Mr Go will kill me for telling you this but on occasion he requests funds and it’s not my place to question him.”

“I direct the secretary to dispatch the funds.”

“Why should I care what Mr Go does with his money? It is his business. He can do as he wishes.”

“So you’re sending him the money?”

“It is his wish.”

“He has too many wishes – first and foremost a death wish!”

Kang winced.

“Well,” No conceded, “at least you’re concerned. I can tell by the look on your face. That’s a start, anyway.”

He waved her off. “I’m sorry. You are wrong – the look on my face means unfortunately I have to excuse myself again.”

He came out from behind his desk and hobbled toward the door.

No called, “I think you’re making excuses. Is that all you can say for yourself?”

“I can also say I’m never going to that rotten bulgogi restaurant again. And don’t you either. It’s that one right across the street from here, with the big fancy sign…”

He rushed out and disappeared down the hall.

A minute later No decided she’d got all she was going to get, got sick of waiting and decided to pack it in.

As a last resort, she’d try to solicit the assistance of the secretary. But as she approached her, a voice could be heard from out in the hallway.

“Miss Ping…” It was Kang calling from the men’s room.

“Yeah,” replied the secretary.

“Bathroom tissue please! There’s none left.”

The loyal staffer dug through her purse for a personal package of tissue then shot to the men’s can.

While No waited at reception ruminating and fuming, she glanced around the lobby and noted how clean and tidy it was.

Likely because of this secretary she thought, doubting that Kang had much to do with it. Ayeesh! 

This – the lobby, furniture, classrooms, everything – is my business and this man is conspiring with his dysfunctional friend to run it into the ground. Men!

* But it’s not her business… *

She stormed out of the lobby and strode down the hall to stand within earshot of the men’s washroom.

She had to get out of this place. Yet Korean style dictated that she at least say goodbye.

“Mr Kang this meeting is over and I am leaving. I am wasting my time with you.”

The secretary had been frantically passing bathroom tissue over the stall door to Kang. She now rushed out to soothe the irate guest.

“Madame! Don’t go! Mr Kang will be right with you. Please be patient. He is very … ill.” She put her arm in Miss No’s and warmly led her out into the hallway.

No had the secretary’s attention so she laid her concerns on the line, realizing it might be her only chance.

* Will Miss Ping be able to give No some more information? *

*

Tomorrow: Miss Ping reveals that she’s more involved in this disappearing money situation than you’d think…