Martoons

Cast of characters

Fred

‘Santa’ (Dame)

Mrs Kim

Mrs Park

*

Santa and Fred were at the other end of the short tunnel, just outside the soju tent’s rear. Santa smiled as he stuck his head up like a gopher in spring.

The only person in view was one guilty-looking male beachgoer who was taking a leak on the nearby concrete retaining wall beside the steel staircase.

The look on his face was priceless as he heard the commotion and turned to see some odd-looking Korean guy climbing out of a hole – followed by a waygook – and he inadvertently peed down the inside of his pants.

Santa squeezed out of the hole, brushed the sand off his clothes, and extended an arm down to Fred. “Mission accomplished.”

As Fred frantically swept sand off his pants, the inevitable occurred to him: This must be Mr Go’s escape plan.

He eyed-up the staircase and commenced jogging toward it, calling back to Dame, “Thank you old man.”

* So he doesn’t realize that the ‘old man’ is actually Dame? *

“Wait!” Santa wedged his hand down in his pocket, removing a fistful of folded, crumpled money.

“Here’s a cab fare for you in case you need it.”

“Get on the road as fast as you can. I’ll delay Miss No and company as long as possible.” He hastily handed over the cash and shoed Fred off.

Fred hoofed it up the two flights of frozen, steel stairs and jogged steadily through the taxi parking lot to the road.

He was tired and hungry and gasping for breath, yet everything was clear now.

I have to escape this beach and beat Miss No back to Chinju. My very survival in Korea depends on it.

He held out a feint hope that Thomas would still be waiting in his car up at the front.

If they got on the road now, they’d avoid the massive traffic jam that No and Co. was going to get stuck in.

Fred’s throat was all constricted and he desperately inhaled for more air. Cars were already starting to whiz by. He started running toward the front.  

* Will Thomas still be there? *

*

Secret Ride         

Now within a stone’s throw of Thomas’ designated meeting spot, Fred saw only an empty parking space.

He had a distinct sense that his compatriot was long gone.

* Do you think that is the case? *

Unlike Koreans, who will wait for a friend even to the point of being late, Thomas was still a true Canadian and ran by the clock.

Fred guessed that he’d waited a few minutes and then left.

Yet suddenly pulling into that same empty spot was the Mr Go look-alike car – the one that had passed Fred earlier when he’d gone to get the drinks.

The driver had been that spazzy woman who’d rolled down her window and yelled things.

“Hello Meesta Fred! I am Meesus Kim… I know you. You know me…”

Finally it clicked. It was the Mrs Kim – the housewife – from Central Institute. Drum dance Mrs Kim.

And at this very moment getting out of the passenger door was her friend Mrs Park – Andong soju Mrs Park.

She was beckoning Fred to hurry up, in a friendly and excited way.

Mr Go’s words from last night echoed again in Fred’s head: Somebody will offer you something. You will be familiar with that person. Go along with them.

This was the person. Fred could feel it. And that something was a ride.

* He’s got it! *

He picked up his pace and trotted to the vehicle with a whole new sense of purpose. Everything was crystal clear now.

His future in Korea had just opened up in front of him.

“We must leave right now,” Fred said commandingly. “There will soon be many cars on the road.”

Mrs Park agreed but cautioned. “We must drive safely. Don’t worry Fred. Mr Go will wait for you in Chinju at the institute.”

* Will he? *

Park and Fred got in and the doors slammed shut. Mrs Kim lurched hastily out into a break in the traffic and sped off.

*

Tomorrow: ‘Santa’ changes back into Damion, but is his prank completely over?…