Martoons

Cast of characters

Mr Go

Fred

Miss No

*

Kang hung up.

Fred’s eyes panned back to Go. He was still sitting rigidly in his chair with the cell phone in one hand and his other hand down out of sight.

Ice cold determination burned in his eyes and his teeth were grinding together. Miss No’s frantic garbling was coming out of the cell phone.

“Hurry, hurry! Comrade Go follow my orders exactly.”

* Will Comrade Go do it?! *

Go was still firmly gripping the knife’s handle but his palm was now greasy with sweat. His wrist and forearm were shaking.

Fred remained oblivious to the hidden hand but noticed overall that Go was wavering. Was the soju wearing off?

Try to distract him in some way. Get the cell phone away from him.

Fred then spotted his own little conical water cup down on the floor. He bent down and picked it up.

* What is Fred about to do to try and distract Go? *

“Mr Go, I am so happy that you have introduced me to Mr Kang. I’d like to propose a toast.”

When you’re drinking in Korea with colleagues, you simply hold your cup out and another will fill it.

And if you hold your cup with two hands – a higher level of formality and respect – the person with the bottle will pour with two hands.

This is traditional Korean drinking style.

Fred held his paper cup out two-handedly; Go looked and his facial angst seemed to instantly soften.

He decisively put the cell phone on the desk and what he did next made the colour drain from Fred’s face:

Go withdrew his hand from the drawer very matter-of-factly and placed the sushi knife also on the desk, and then hastily closed the drawer as if to say, “Let’s get to the soju.”

Go joyfully reached for the soju bottle, as if he were suddenly placed back in some long-lost night on the town during army leave days.

He carefully began to pour the soju with two hands. “Ah, yeah…”  

Fred was aghast at the sushi knife sitting there, yet held his little paper cup out two-handedly and watched with satisfied eyes as Go filled it with the clear, lethal liquid.

Fred couldn’t help but sneak a peak at that horrible, menacing knife sitting on the desk – with its blade pointed right at him – and along beside it the cell.

Miss No at the other end must have been confused because she wasn’t saying anything – yet Fred could feel her brooding presence. He’d make his move in a few seconds.

* What will Fred’s move be?… *

First, he quaffed his cone of soju and quickly handed the paper cup off to Go in exchange for the bottle. Go’s eyes lit-up as he watched Fred pour.

A split-second later, Comrade No’s diabolical diatribe disseminated once again from the cell. “Comrade Go! What’s going on? Are you there? Hello, hello?”

Oddly, Go was completely immersed in the soju ritual.

Fred got set to make his next move – snatch the cell phone – but it all came down to split-second timing: He was extremely wary of touching-off an emotional firestorm if he too abruptly grabbed it.

And now there was that deadly knife to contend with. If I can only get one item – which?

* Which item is Fred going to go for? *

He reasoned that the cell phone was more crucial – with that out of the picture, Miss No was nullified and so, presumably, was the knife.

Yet Fred’s mind was a blank as to how to get the cell phone.

To bide a few seconds, he gestured with the soju bottle and proposed another, more robust toast – this time standing up as he uttered:

“Cheers! Mr Go, to … to … to our wonderful friendship! And to Korea – number one!”

Go also stood up as per Korean drinking customs and slugged back his cupful.

They exchanged again and this time Go poured a larger shot into Fred’s cup.

As Fred tilted his head back and gulped down the full mouthful, the bitter brew’s recoil caused him to lose balance and stumble.

His arm jerked and accidentally splattered soju on Go’s desk and all over the cell phone and the knife.

Go’s reaction time was slow however, and it took a few seconds for horror to register on his face as the soju enlarged into a spreading, glistening puddle on his desk surface.

Fred remained cool, rational. If I try for the knife and Go beats me to it, I could very well become sushi.

He waited for Go’s next move. An agonizing second went by and then Go picked up the wet cell phone, shook it off, and stuck it up to his ear.

His face was grave, as he exclaimed desperately, [“Comrade No! Comrade No! Hello hello! Very sorry – accident here. Hello? Hello?”]

Fred cracked a tiny, smug smile as he concluded that the spilled soju had seeped down into the cell phone’s tiny pores and crevices, shorting and crossing enough circuits to cut its connection.

*

Tomorrow: Kang talks to Comrade Go on the phone and Miss No and party get stuck in traffic.