Martoons

Today: Mr E relays an encounter.

Cast of characters

Mr E

Mr Go 

“A foreigner”

Scene: Ice Noodle Restaurant

*

“He has a bad…key-boon with his sister,” said Mr E. 

“You mean ‘relationship’? Like, he doesn’t get along with her?” replied Fred. 

“Yeah. So he did not like having to wait for her. Also, he can’t stand Chinju. Nothing to do, he says.

“Anyway, he came to my bank at first to exchange foreign currency but then kept dropping around to chit chat. He asked me if Chinju had any casinos.

Casinos are only in several specially designated areas in Korea, far away from Chinju. All we have here are slot machines so I took him. He is very lucky at games of chance. He won a thousand dollars.”

* Is it luck, or something else?… *

E slurped the last of his noodles. “After a couple of days, still no sister. The foreigner had the address of her prospective employer. Actually, as I told you before, I know the owner there – Mr Go.

“I thought the foreigner would make some problem for Mr Go, but they actually started meeting at night. They drank a lot of soju after hours and became best friends quickly.

“One night, the three of us went for a big dinner of Korean bacon and soju. I had a funny feeling that the foreigner was up to something. Usually a Korean will pay for the meal if a foreigner is present, but this waygook insisted on paying.”

“It made Mr Go and me very uncomfortable…”

* Why did the foreigner insist on paying? *

“After, we went to the slot machine arcade again. Go didn’t have much money but the foreigner loaned him some. Go’s not very lucky in gambling, but he won five hundred dollars.”

He bought the foreigner a gift from an electronics store – a hand-held, pocket video camera.

The foreigner loved it.

“Actually, it was annoying. He started filming everything. Then we went to an expensive singing room with lovely hostesses and the foreigner absolutely insisted on paying the whole shot again. And he insisted on filming everything!”

* Do you think he caught Go or E doing something dishonourable? * 

“Go and I couldn’t help but think that something was brewing as we watched that red film record light flicker continuously.”

“Sure enough, finally we went to a raunchy soju tent. That’s when the foreigner totally changed his attitude, became much more serious and said he wanted to talk business…”

*

“Where is my sister?” the foreigner asked Go. “She was supposed to arrive here last week.”

“Ayeesh,” said Go, caught off-guard and nervously running his fingers through his slicked-back hair. “It is difficult.”

He lit a cigarette and inhaled. “There is some problem.”

He noticed the foreigner’s soju shot glass was empty and refilled it for him.

* What was the problem? *

“Ko-ma-wa (Thanks),” the foreigner said.

He backed off his questioning for the time being, and – having already observed that soju is like a truth serum – kept plying Go with shot after shot of the clear, harmless-looking liquid.

After a half-dozen shots in as many minutes, Go confessed.

“I am very sorry. I cannot give your sister job. Why? Because she looks like a Korean. I’ve already cancelled her papers. My clients prefer – how you say – white people?”

The foreigner – always one for theatrics and histrionics – slammed down his soju glass and shook his head.

He picked up his video camera off the table beside him – it had been running all the time – and put the viewfinder up to his eye.

He was pointing it at Go.

“That’s racism – and you my friend don’t have a leg to stand on!”

Go fidgeted and didn’t comment.

He wasn’t sure if the foreigner was just joking or perhaps putting on a little act for his camera.

“Speak now or forever hold your peace,” the foreigner said.

Go ignored him. “Ayeesh,” he muttered under his breath and took another huge puff off his cigarette.

“Turn off the camera – please!”

“Cut!” the foreigner said. “The End.” He shut off the camera and folded the viewfinder into it.

Without warning he got up and hastily headed toward the soju tent’s exit flap.

“You’ll be hearing from my lawyer,” he announced but realized that that sounded lame and he really should learn some Korean threats.

He slid through the tent flap and disappeared outside.

* What do you think he did, or is going to do with this recording? *

Go exchanged looks with Mr E. What-the-f…!? 

Then E gestured that perhaps Go should run out after the foreigner and reconcile.

Go agreed.

He was a sensitive man and like any Korean, abhorred causing a bad feeling with a friend, especially a foreign guest.

Bursting out of the tent’s exit, he yelled “Wait a minute!” after the foreigner, who was just getting into a cab.

“What I did was Korean style! I am the owner of this business.”

The foreigner ignored him and started closing the cab door.

Go was irritated. “I can do what I want! It is up to me!”

The foreigner didn’t respond and slammed the door shut.

The cab took off.

“Ayeesh!” Go muttered one final time. “Arrogant prick. Who does he think he is?”

*

Tomorrow: Mr E’s wild story continues .  .  .